Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
