69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
