ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Randomize
