I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
These tits shall not be calmed
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