Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
Randomize
