turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Randomize
