thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
