So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
