If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I wear drunk well.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
