How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
