Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
You need a sexual gate keeper
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Randomize