what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Randomize
