So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Randomize
