Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
