Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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