At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
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