That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
