We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
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