he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
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