Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
You did what with his pubic hair?
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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