bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
