She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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