i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
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