***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Let's get the cat blown out
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Randomize
