oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize
