Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Randomize