Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
