i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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