Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Randomize
