But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
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