Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
we made out on top of his cat.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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