Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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