hell yes lets make some ravioli
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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