what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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