oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Randomize
