i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
