Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
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