It was confusing and full of hummus
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize
