I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
