I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
you never un-have a 4some
I smell like Dick and happiness
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Randomize
