At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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