haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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