Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
