Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Randomize
