how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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