I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
He's a Shit stain on my heart
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
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