Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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