Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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