More tranny stories later!
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
