Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
